Ah-men!

Spiritual fucking is a term I have coined for desperate mortals who know that they have a bleak chance with women. They try to use terms like warm, caring friendship and sharing joys and sorrows to bond with a woman spiritually before they can get into her pants. They think that they will be able to give the woman a holy orgasm and tickle her senses! All they manage to do is tickle her funny bone. They are creeps of the lowest order. And their life value to intelligent and smart women is less than that of a cockroach. They are below mind fuckers!

The mind fuckers come in next. See, the mind fuckers manage to score a couple of points more than the spiritual fuckers. They don't discuss warm bonding but they incessantly try to portray how cool they are. Long drives and pubbing are their favourite hobbies. They look decent and may have even managed to lay a woman or two in their lives. That gives them so much confidence that they feel they can lay a Salma Hayek if allowed a date! They come with their "I am just looking for fun" tag line. And yet, in that one date, they want to talk about themselves - their cool friends, their cool bikes and cars, their love for pets, what turns them on in a woman, blah, blah, blah. Not once asking the woman how she can manage to keep her eyes open! So, at the end of all that mind fucking, 235 and a half yawns and ‘sad food never felt so yummy experience!’, the woman never wants to use the word fuck and him in the same sentence. Unless, the words come together with multiple exclamations and maybe, even the finger!

Then there are the semi cheapos or the one night stoods! The semi cheapos come out at as charming, sweet boys on the first date. They can make decent conversations, entertain women with their half decent half-baked histrionics and may even end up at her place. The sex is decent with some foreplay. The woman's satisfaction level is directly proportional to the number drinks she has downed. So if he has managed to get her drunk, he may get a four out ten in bed. The problem happens the next morning when the woman wakes up with a hangover and that toad next to her. Not surprisingly, she fails to have any decent conversation with him. With monosyllabic cordiality they split over a cup of coffee. He even promises to meet her again. But all he talks to her in the next few days over chat or text is sex. He lives with the hope that she will oblige. The woman realises that she prefers candles to him any day and promptly blocks him off her chat and sms. So that one night stand turns into a one night stood when he turns from Cinderella to a pumpkin.

Then there are the social schizos! They love to socialise, meet interesting people and make their life happening. They are pretty interesting themselves. Well mannered, good conversationalists and funny, they charm the women. The women after meeting the three low-lifes realize that maybe they can finally have a good time, which they do. The first date is a good one, where conversations flow along with the booze. The women feel relaxed and safer. They tend to let their guards down. The social schizo on the other hand also manages to have a good time. He doesn't put the woman to sleep and as a bonus, makes her laugh too. The conversation moves from the bar to the bedroom and eventually, he gets laid. He starts to enjoy the company! He even manages to hug the woman to sleep. But the schizo in him wakes up the next morning when he realises that he is having a good time and wanting some more is inversely proportional to his freedom. Suddenly, he feels claustrophobic and blames his social personality for making him have such a good time. The coffee conversation starts with I had a great time last night, moves to you are a wonderful lady and finally stops at I hope you are not looking for something serious in this. He decides to slap his schizo personality to rest for some time and continues with his acquittal conversation. The woman on the other hand is flabbergasted. She pretends to sit through all this with her I understand what you are saying smile but her eyes keep moving to the nearby kitchen knife. She cannot stab him but she hopes that the delusional talks end soon. All she can think is the great chemistry, which turned to better biology which at that moment was rapidly changing to Braille.

Satiation..??

My last blog was on April 8th and its been 4 months and i am still suffering from a blogger's block..After reading some great blogs,its kinds reconfirmed that my blog would get a rating of 3.5/10..(What an optimist!!!)..Where the world changes in a minute,a 4 month break is like an era. Lots have changed in this period,some for the better and some...
I am finally done with my MBA and thankfully employed.Now I work in an ad agency and am getting paid for what I always wanted to do.Its some kinda miracle!Its really like a dream come true.The next best thing that happened to me is that finally I have a place of my own.I stay alone.Its a small room on the terrace.A penthouse,you see!(thats my snooty personality no 17 speaking)Its one hell of a place.Every night when I am back home,the terrace is the place where I unwind,listen to music,smoke and enjoy the silence (barring the few loud and long howls by the street dogs).From the distance I can se the Philips Tower,standing all bright and cheerful..Its awesome.
In these 4 months,I have met a lot of new people and lost a lot of old ones.Life is infact a continious metamorphosis and yeah,we human beings also moult.
Its been so far so good..I am free,independent and no longer claustrophobic..Looks like finally I have made it..life is now more like a dream and I am satiated..Satiated??..Naah..The next thing I wanna do is...(there I go on...!Gawd!)

Know me is know how...

The "Know Me" Tag
The "Know Me" Tag

Three Names You Go By:
Amritarupa (but now its turned to amrita and rupa..aargh!)
Amrita( A shorter version of the former..but in maharashtra its Amruta and here in south india its amritha..)
Amu(Thts what my frens call me.)

Three screen names:
Gabbling Away..(Thts my orkut screen name now..for a person who can yap nonstop..its kinda ideal)
pipi ... (Thts my chat id that i had used years ago..those memories..(dreamy eyes))
binny_y2k..(this is from the y2k era..binny??..still dunno..)

Three Physical Things You Like About Yourself:(aha!!finally I can go on my narcissistic trip!!)
My Smile
My Nose
My -----

Three physical things I don't like about myself:(only 3!!! i could just go on & on..)
My HAIR
My GIRTH
My FEET ...


Four parts of my heritage:
Darjeeling ... born there ... and someday wanna go back n settle there forever..
Kolkata..my school..lotsa goood memories..
Pune..Where all the GROWIN up happened..literally..
Hyderabad..

Three things that scare me:
Losing the people I love..
My mind..
Uncertainity..

Three things I want in a relationship:
Love
Fun
Compatibility..


Three statements about you which are not all true or all false:
I am very rational..
I am overtly competitive..
I am a *BITCH*..

Three physical things about the opposite sex that appeals to me:
Smile..
Voice..
Strong arms..

Three things I want to do badly right now:As in Now??
Leave office and go to sleep..( I dont have too much work today..:-(...)
Meet someone..
Go to some hillstation for a couple of days...

Three places I want to go on a vacation:
Himachal Pradesh ... I think its heaven
Greece ... Where's the dough??.. Blue waters n small white houses..
Vienna...thanx to the movie - "before sunrise"

Three Kids names I like:
Agastya
Reva
Bozo


Three things to do before I die:
Have a bank balance of over a crore of rupees,hmm..dollar is better..
Go backpackin across Europe and South America
Be very very very happy..

Three essentials in my day to day:
Radio city..
my ciggs..
Money..

Three things I am wearing right now:
My fav black shirt
A UCOB perfume
A smile

My toony life..

..and Amrita lived happily ever after......

Will this be the fairy tale ending of my MBA story,when I look at my placement officer,she really makes me feel so..

Claustrophobia...

Have you ever felt a sudden urge to be alone..all alone.Or move to a place where noone knows you.A feeling of walking into an apartment,where only you stay..only you.Dunno if you do,but nowdays I fell that way.Theres a sudden desire to be all by myself,live only for myself,hibernate till i wanna come out & meet the rest of the world.
I have been in a hostel for the major part of my life,shared my room with 2/3 room mates or my dorm with 42 others.Apart from the bed and the cupboard,nothin was my own. There wasn't a place where i could go and be all alone. Yeah,there were always the loos but with 50 other people using it,it wasnt the heaven that u always dream of.And no thought there can be stronger than the stench.
The few years I had been with my parents,at home,the room was mine but the space wasn't.My mother strongly believes that in a typical Indian family (which she thought we were,nbut now she begs to differ),there is nothing as private space. Everything is a family issue & can be worked out as just another dinner table solutions. In a year's time, I will be married to the man I have loved for a long time.The house would be "our" house. But the craving for solitude has not subsided.Told my mom and my would be husband,that i need 6 months..6 months all to myself..6 months in a place,where I would be a complete stranger.But they think its another bout of insanity. Looks like my wish for solitary confinement will never be granted!!

Standing in a crowd,
a creepy little doubt,
Fills up my mind,
in a desparate bid to find,
a place for myself,
a place of my own,
very far from that place,
where from childhood,
i have grown,
Will the search ever end?,
And the rules ever bend?..

A world of our own..

When i had left Mumbai one n a half years back,I had dreamt big.Dreamt of sailing through the MBA course & landing up with a job that would assure me a fat pay packet.I had planned to settle down in bangalore itself & enjoy the slow paced life compared to the mad rush back home.That was my vision,mission and goal at that juncture in life.
The First realisation that dawned on me was how much I missed Mumbai. Though unlike my classmates it wasnt the first time i had left home (i have been in a hostel for the major part of my life) . Still I missed Mumbai & it was to such an extent that I had ended up comparing every street,every corner,every house to Mumbai and realised that Home is infact where the heart is .And my heart was'nt in bangalore!
I was told before joining the course that one doesnt make friends In MBA colleges.not when you aim to bag the best placements and projects & in the process become selfish..very selfish.I was even told before leaving that for the next 2 years,I would have to live in cocoon.It would only be I,me & myself,a true sign of a professional (all i can do when i think of this theory,is swear!)
Realisation II was that when u make good friends, you neither live in a cocoon nor believe in the I,me & myself theory. Here,we are a group of people who makes each other's lives in bangalore worth living!. For us, " we " matter more than 'me',more than projects,more than placements,et all.It's our own world,away from the incessant pressures of college,profs & our own career expectations.Where "we" look forward to the evenings in our den & over a cup of chai or kaapi , go through the day's happenings,gossip about who's doing what..who's seeing whom, & bitch about our "common enemies". Where i dread the weekends when some of us would go home and for the remaining (which is mostly me) it is empty corridors & lonely days. Where, birthdays mean a cake appearing out of no-where at midnight and loud out-of-tune "happy birthday to you..". And later,where you are stripped of all your savings in the name of a birthday treat. Where exams rock & are more like picnics with loads of food for the night-outs and inedible PJs cracked under stress.A world where you never feel lonely and depressed.
This post is an ode to Sarita,Anu,Ciby and Niti for making my life so much better here.Love you guys!